Stop letting go

I’ve heard so many teachers talk about letting go in spiritual and psychological practice. And sometimes that energy seems like the perfect action to take. But most of the time, I’ve found a better description is actually to let it be.

Allowing.

When we sit with our emotions, desires, aversions, we recognize they are not going anywhere. At least not by our will. They don’t want to go, they just want to be. To be heard. To be noticed. To be accepted. To be. To be.

Letting it be carries this air of allowance. With a touch, maybe of appreciation. And it’s this letting be, that eventually they pass, all on their own.
All we did, if we did anything, was allow them in the first place.

Letting go, can sometimes feel to adversarial. To action oriented. Like in letting go, there is just a little bit of pushing. Just a little bit of desire. Of incomplete acceptance.

A difficult memory, a painful emotion, a deep desire. They are already here. If we resist them, they dig their heels in. But if we allow them they lighten. They soften around the edges. And eventually they go on their own. No letting required.

In fact, the more time I spend with allowing, I start to realize that allowing is somehow already happening. There is not even an action occuring. As in Allow isn’t even a verb. It’s somehow an adjective to experiance itself. I’m not doing anything. If anything, I guess I’m sort of finding the allowing that is already present. It’s very passive.

I drop the resistance. Drop the wishful thinking. Drop the aversion. Maybe I search for the allowing that is already there. Then I drop the searching too.

One of my favorite teachers said “Let go, the let go of letting go.”

I still love that saying. But maybe it could have been “let it be, then let being, be.”